Judging by the number of books recently published about the joys of swimming in the sea as well as in Britain’s many lakes and rivers, outdoor swimming is enjoying a renaissance writes Julia Stephenson.

 

Despite being as soft a Southerner as they come, in warm spells I am a regular at the Serpentine in London where I love nothing more than flinging myself into the lido for energising swims. Brrrrrr. Yes it’s bracing but boy do you feel wonderful afterwards.

During hot spells this Elysian paradise is crammed choc-a-bloc with permatanned lounge lizardy types all chatting each other up energetically.  If you are a glam over 60 and looking for a hot date on a Saturday night, it’s the place to be.

Swimming eau naturel amongst swans and ducks makes the city feel miles away.  The Serpentine water is fed by its own artesian spring and is so clean it has Blue Flag status.  Occasionally there is a bit of a drama when the life guard stomps around shouting `Algae Alert!’, (Don’t panic Mr Mainwaring!) which puts off the feeble minded but fortunately leaves more room for the rest of us. There’s actually nothing wrong with a spot of algae, but due to the dreaded `elf and safety brigade, unless people are warned they can sue if they slip or some such nonsense.

When it’s hot there is sometimes quite a bit of algae about.  This causes the exceedingly well groomed metrosexuals, (preeny `new men’ who buy male grooming products, wax all their body hair and must be the only people reading endless `beauty’ articles about male spas and pointless male beautification rituals) to look at me with anxiety as I emerge green and dripping with 5 different types of pond weed from the water.  The trouble is it gets right into your bikini bottoms and trails out of your crotch like some sort of terrible green discharge. Less Green Goddess, more Green Thrush Monster.

One of the metrosexuals was so concerned he stared at my crotch with dismay and asked if I was OK and if it was really safe to swim.

`No, I’m feeling WRETCHED,’ I lied causing him to retreat to his sun lounger with relief.

The thing is, serious swimmers like moi need all the space we can get and these metro-men are so well moisturized they leave horrid oil slicks of expensive male grooming unguents on the water.  Far more noxious than any algae.  Not only that but their lane discipline leaves much to be desired. I can’t understand the fuss about algae – chlorine is far more toxic to us and our environment and yet that is flung with casual abandon in most swimming pools in the land. And it can make your hair turn green, and unlike the algae, doesn’t wash out.  Interestingly, up the road, Harrods charge £150 for an algae wrap but at the Serpentine, I get its beauteous benefits included in the £3.50 entrance fee.

The UK has hundreds of similarly stunning outdoor pools.  The excellent organisation, the River and Lake Swimming Association lists many of them and enthusiastically promotes all open swimming from tidal pools to the sea.  But maddeningly these lovely swimming spots, used safely for generations, are under constant threat from the Royal Society for the Prevention of Accidents, as well as the aforementioned Health and Safety lobby, who toil energetically to close them.

The latter did their best to close the Hampstead Heath Swimming pond to swimmers on winter mornings but in 2006 a hardy band of local swimmers took them to court where they won a landmark ruling in their favour and managed to see the busy bodies off.  When delivering his verdict the judge spoke out in favour of `individual freedom’ and against the imposition of a `grey and dull safety regime’.  Hurrah! 

The no nonsense cockney couple who run the Serpentine insist the water is pure enough to drink and as I’ve gulped enough of it during my swims and felt bouncy and energetic afterwards they may well be right. Not many lakes are fed by their own artesian spring so it’s probably much purer than the dodgy over priced stuff, shipped from round the world and of dubious quality that we pay a fortune for in supermarkets and restaurants. 

With the warm spell set to last into next week, why not check out your local outdoor swimming spot and dive straight in? http://www.wildswimming.co.uk